Michele K. Short/FXRANT: American Horror Story: This episode can't say it didn't warn us of that ending. With a title like "Blood Bath," we're not sure what else we could have possibly expected. After killing his mother due to her not loving him enough to murder Regina – or simply due to the insane whims of a total psychopath – Dandy shot Gloria in the head and promptly took a bath in what we can assume to be her blood. We also learned that Dandy was born of a tryst between Gloria and her second cousin. Frances Conroy deserved better.Well, there's good news and bad news from tonight's TV. Let's get to the bad news first...
RANT: American Horror Story: The same could be said for Kathy Bates, whose character Ethel met her end tonight after a fight with Elsa. Ethel believed that Elsa killed Ma Petite and was planning to expose her plans to separate the twins, so Elsa threw a knife into her eye, obviously. Stanley then helped her stage a car accident for the rest of the troupe to later discover. Ugh.
RANT: American Horror Story: Oh and Desiree, Amazon Eve, and Suzi helped Penny tar and feather her father in retaliation for turning Penny into the Lizard Woman. They were planning on cutting off his penis and feeding his body to alligators, but luckily for us and everyone involved, Maggie stepped in and reminded them that that was a terrible idea.
RANT: American Horror Story: Is there a point to all this madness? Every episode just makes us sad, and not in a good sad way. Just a sad sad way. Our first reaction to tonight's deaths was "Oh wow, two series regulars!" instead of "Oh no, characters we liked!" That's not great.
CW
Now for the good news!
RAVE: Arrow: Perfection, right? While last night we got to see Team Arrow join in on Team Flash's somewhat lighthearted superpowered chase of a rainbow-themed bad guy, things got a little more serious tonight when Team Flash took a trip to Starling City to help fight a man with a grudge and a lot of explosive boomerangs. Yet again, it was awesome. We have no complaints.
RAVE: Arrow: Barry in Starling City is perhaps our new favorite Barry, whether he's racing off for sushi, racing up and down the salmon ladder, or racing to put together an exploded boomerang. Plus, he helped knock some sense into Mr. Broody McBroodyface, telling Oliver that while the Arrow is a "douche," Oliver Queen is inspiring and doesn't have to give up his humanity in order to do his job. Beautiful. Plus, it's awesome that one main revelation from these two episodes is that the Arrow really is kind of the worst.
RAVE: Arrow: Who knew one of our favorite moments from the Flarrow crossover ep would be a solely Arrow development? Diggle and Lyla are engaged! Finally! Since Captain Boomerang was a former employee at Argus and had a personal vendetta against Lyla, she and Diggle were a major focus tonight and we loved it.
RAVE: Modern Family: The Dunphys have been so on point this season. Tonight's continued gag of Phil and Claire not believing in Alex's boyfriends due to the fact that she kept describing them with things that happened to be in the room was totally silly but also hilarious, and finally gave Alex something to do that wasn't just pointing out what an idiot everybody else is.
ABC/Mark Levine
RAVE: Nashville: Blah blah blah, Rayna loves Luke, Deacon loves Rayna, Rayna's moved on, he's sad, blah blah. We cared way more about super preggo Juliette attempting a disguise and zooming through the crowd at a music festival before knocking over a vendor's booth and making a huge mess, all due to her jealousy over Avery talking to Sadie. Crazy? Sure. But it was also hilarious, and "cute," as Avery called it.
RAVE: The 100: Finn has been pardoned for last week's massacre, but it looks like it's going to be a real struggle for Clarke to forgive him. We're not even sure we want her to. While we don't love Finn's actions, we do love the many morality questions this show makes us ask ourselves.
RANT: Red Band Society: Way to leave us hanging with a ton of cliffhangers – namely concerning the Leo/Emma/Kara triangle that has sort of kind of been happening, but tonight was super happening. Leo, upset that Emma hasn't called him back, went out with Kara to blow off some steam and they ended up having sex in her car. Meanwhile, after finally calling Leo back and getting no answer (due to him being very, very busy), Emma had a sort of breakdown and ended up passed out on her bathroom floor!
RAVE: Mob Wives: We loved seeing Drita, Natalie and Big Ang's alliance stronger than ever. But seeing their reaction to having Karen back on the show was priceless! Maybe it won't be three-against-one after all.
What did you watch tonight? Rant and rave with us in the comments!
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